dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
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Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
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I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!