Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
