wrigley field is MILF paradise
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Randomize
