Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
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