I wish I could teleport
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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