ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
