wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
