i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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