I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Randomize
