he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Randomize