Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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