Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Randomize
