I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring