i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen