Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(609): View more from New Jersey

this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.

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(858): View more from California

Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it

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(248): View more from Michigan

I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(519): View more from Ontario

and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar

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(843): View more from South Carolina

you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.

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(510): View more from California

Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.

(650): View more from California

Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.

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