I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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