He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
