what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
