something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
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well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
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I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
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