Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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