i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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