Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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