I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
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