we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Randomize
