she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize