Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
