idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
She's the barista slut.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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