the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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