who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
