Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Randomize