My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
He told me they were just razor bumps!
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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