Sponge bath it is.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
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