Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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