sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
