our cab driver is having phone sex.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize
