i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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