their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I think I am morally bankrupt
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
