i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
