she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize