You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
