She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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