Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
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