How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize