so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
We are two peas in an std pod
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
