Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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