the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
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More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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