sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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