I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
