Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
