I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How