I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."