We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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