Three words: puerto rican gang bang
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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