dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
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After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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