we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
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I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
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The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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